lumpiabasah
27th May 2012, 05:44 PM
FUNNY SMS
maaf bahasa inggris:)
http://dhonconstantine.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/iphonesms1.jpg?w=300&h=302
[/spoiler] for buka:
A Girl Checks Her Weight = 58kg .
Removes Sandal = 56.
Then Dupatta = 52
Now Coins Finished.......
.
.
.
.
A Boy In A Q Behind Her
Said
� Carry On"",
I Have Coins!
===============================
~ Romance Mathematics ~
Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy
===============================
If u r stressed, you'll get pimples..
if u cry,u'll get wrinkles..
So, y don't u smile & get dimples?
===============================
have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can�t send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I�m sending you just 1 joke
.
.
.
�You are so beautiful�
===============================
God made us body parts for a reason.
Eyes: to look at you
Hands: to pray for you
Mind: to remember you
Heart: to miss you
and�
Legs: to kick you if u ever forget me!!
===============================
Wife:-I will die.
Husband:- I will also die.
Wife:-why will you die?
Husband:- because I can't bear that much happiness
===============================
Gang of Santa-Banta broke a bank, but instead of cash they find
bottles of chilled red wine...
happily they drink and left
next day headline
~ Braking News ~
"Blood Bank Robbed"
===============================
Aftr robbing d Bank, robber 2 clerk: Did u see me robbing?
Clerk: Yes.
Robber shot him dead & asked d next clerk: Did u?
2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u!
===============================
Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye,
I don't worry I don't cry,
I'm just happy that cows can't fly!
===============================
Keep.....................IN TOUCH WID ME.....
OTHERWISE............................1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31 32 ALL..........UR TEETH WILL B BROKEN!!!
===============================
Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
===============================
A baby monkey asks his father, Father why r we so ugly?
The father says to him, don't stress my son
u should see the one who is reading this!!
===============================
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Bcoz they are already leading a dog's life!
===============================
if i need "Brain Transplantation" I will prefer your brain...
don't think that you are a genius..........
i need a brain which is never used before
===============================
Father: How did you fail the final exam?
Son: Under water
Aather: What do you mean?
Son :All below 'C' level
===============================
A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I-------------------------------------------------------------------U,V,W,X,Y,Z.
WHAT R U LOOKING FOR?
I KILLED ALL THOSE WHO WERE BETWEEN I & U
===============================
Banta owned a factory.
He issued orders that only married
men would be employed.
Friend asks: Why this ?
Bant reply:
Because married men are more obedient.
===============================
Government of Australia has
introduced a new rule
Good looking people should be
thrown out of country!!!
U r safe..
oh! No where should I Hide you???
===============================
Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: why three?
Husband: 4 u and ur parents.
===============================
2 days of power cut in Delhi had made life miserable worst affected was "Delhi metro station"
where families of Santa and Banta were stuck for 48 hrs on.... Escalators
===============================
Son - I want a baby brother .
Mom - your dad is overseas. When he comes back we will talk over it .
Son - why don't u give him a surprise?
===============================
A newly married girl got first class in her B.Ed exams.
Her husband sent telegram to her parents -
Ruby First Class in Bed!
===============================
Close your eyes I have a gift for you
1
2
3
Oh u didn't close your eyes!!!!!
===============================
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey?
A kiss is so dear,
a car is too dear and
a monkey is U dear.
===============================
What do u call a woman in heaven? - An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven? - A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven? - PEACE ON EARTH!
===============================
Banta falls in luv wit a nurse..
After much thinking, he finally writes a luv letter 2 her: "I LUV U SISTER"
===============================
MBBS Final Exam:-
Question: Fill in the blanks.
If a lady faints, we must 1st check her PU_S_
Only few intelligent students wrote PULSE
===============================
What is diffrence between problem & talent?
2 boys love 1 girl= problem!
1 boy love 2 girls= talent.
===============================
Girl : Mom, i m in love with a guy..
Mom shocked : How old is the boy & what is he doing Girl : 3 month & kicking happily in my stomach..
===============================
terrorists have kidnapped our lecturers... and demanded aransom of 500000 rs or else they will burn them with kerosene... plz donate. i have donated 15 litres.
===============================
can you lend me 2000 Rs? i need it. please help me out, i know you have it, i wil return it .a Banta asks to ATM machine???????
===============================
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day?.?.?.?.... It is just a formality, like two boxers shaking hands b4 the fight begins !
===============================
One day Raja and rani decided to send messages to each other by using Pigeon instead of mobile. The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.
He angried and called to rani.She told stupid "This was a missed call"
===============================
I send dis fish as a sign of friendship Plz take care of it & keep it in mobile & daily put ur mobile in water so tat fish wont DIE:-)
===============================
God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested
===============================
The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn�t it rain on you?
===============================
Could u fax me ur photo very very urgently ?
Mind u - it�s really very very urgent,
damn serious and very imp �
I�m playing cards and we�ve misplaced the JOKER.
===============================
oday, tomorrow and yesterday there will be �
one heart that would always beat for you �
You know Whose??? � your Own Stupid!!!
===============================
Life without u is impossible,
u r in my breath and blood.
i cant stay for a second without u,
if u r not there i am dead
oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN
===============================
have a confession to make
ever since i met u its been hard for me to 4get u
every night i see u in my dreams
and find myself shouting
GHOST GHOST
===============================
i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again
===============================
The animals of a jungle have decided to hold a meeting. The lion has come, the tiger has come, the elephant has come, the monkey has come.. But The meeting hasn�t started. Guess why ? Because the Donkey is busy reading this SMS!
===============================
The more I learn the more I get to know,
the more I know the more I forget,
the more I forget the less I know,
so why should I be learning??
===============================
Sweet candies are nice to eat �
Sweet words are easy to say �
but, sweet ppl are hard to find �
OH MY GOD! how did u find me?
===============================
Girl: when we get married, i want to share all your worries,
troubles and lighten your burden. boy: it's very kind of you,
darling, but i don't have any worries or troubles. girl: well that is because we aren't married yet
===============================
Newton's Law of Romance LOVE CAN NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE DESTROYED, IT CAN ONLY BE CHANGED FROM ONE GIRL FRIEND TO ANOTHER
===============================
Twinkle twinkle little star,
you should know what you are,
and once you know what you are,
Mental hospital is not so far.
===============================
Its INTERNATIONAL GOOD LOOKING DAY! send this to someone that you think is gorgeous, dont send it to me as I have had 100s already
Se
===============================
This message was sent exclusively for the handsome and the beautiful. We have obviously sent it to the wrong number. We are truly sorry for the inconvenience
===============================
Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
===============================
girl friends are like mobile phone, whenever you want happiness just check inbox, whenever u want to cry check out box, and whenever u want to enjoyment just plug in your charger and enjoy.
===============================
Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Everytime!
WIFE satys No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever.
source
[spoiler=open this] for :
http://www.smsdose.com/funny-texts.htm
</div>
maaf bahasa inggris:)
http://dhonconstantine.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/iphonesms1.jpg?w=300&h=302
[/spoiler] for buka:
A Girl Checks Her Weight = 58kg .
Removes Sandal = 56.
Then Dupatta = 52
Now Coins Finished.......
.
.
.
.
A Boy In A Q Behind Her
Said
� Carry On"",
I Have Coins!
===============================
~ Romance Mathematics ~
Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy
===============================
If u r stressed, you'll get pimples..
if u cry,u'll get wrinkles..
So, y don't u smile & get dimples?
===============================
have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can�t send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I�m sending you just 1 joke
.
.
.
�You are so beautiful�
===============================
God made us body parts for a reason.
Eyes: to look at you
Hands: to pray for you
Mind: to remember you
Heart: to miss you
and�
Legs: to kick you if u ever forget me!!
===============================
Wife:-I will die.
Husband:- I will also die.
Wife:-why will you die?
Husband:- because I can't bear that much happiness
===============================
Gang of Santa-Banta broke a bank, but instead of cash they find
bottles of chilled red wine...
happily they drink and left
next day headline
~ Braking News ~
"Blood Bank Robbed"
===============================
Aftr robbing d Bank, robber 2 clerk: Did u see me robbing?
Clerk: Yes.
Robber shot him dead & asked d next clerk: Did u?
2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u!
===============================
Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a poopy in my eye,
I don't worry I don't cry,
I'm just happy that cows can't fly!
===============================
Keep.....................IN TOUCH WID ME.....
OTHERWISE............................1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31 32 ALL..........UR TEETH WILL B BROKEN!!!
===============================
Q: What is the difference b/w secretary & private secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING SIR
===============================
A baby monkey asks his father, Father why r we so ugly?
The father says to him, don't stress my son
u should see the one who is reading this!!
===============================
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Bcoz they are already leading a dog's life!
===============================
if i need "Brain Transplantation" I will prefer your brain...
don't think that you are a genius..........
i need a brain which is never used before
===============================
Father: How did you fail the final exam?
Son: Under water
Aather: What do you mean?
Son :All below 'C' level
===============================
A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I-------------------------------------------------------------------U,V,W,X,Y,Z.
WHAT R U LOOKING FOR?
I KILLED ALL THOSE WHO WERE BETWEEN I & U
===============================
Banta owned a factory.
He issued orders that only married
men would be employed.
Friend asks: Why this ?
Bant reply:
Because married men are more obedient.
===============================
Government of Australia has
introduced a new rule
Good looking people should be
thrown out of country!!!
U r safe..
oh! No where should I Hide you???
===============================
Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: why three?
Husband: 4 u and ur parents.
===============================
2 days of power cut in Delhi had made life miserable worst affected was "Delhi metro station"
where families of Santa and Banta were stuck for 48 hrs on.... Escalators
===============================
Son - I want a baby brother .
Mom - your dad is overseas. When he comes back we will talk over it .
Son - why don't u give him a surprise?
===============================
A newly married girl got first class in her B.Ed exams.
Her husband sent telegram to her parents -
Ruby First Class in Bed!
===============================
Close your eyes I have a gift for you
1
2
3
Oh u didn't close your eyes!!!!!
===============================
What is a difference between a Kiss, a Car and a Monkey?
A kiss is so dear,
a car is too dear and
a monkey is U dear.
===============================
What do u call a woman in heaven? - An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven? - A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven? - PEACE ON EARTH!
===============================
Banta falls in luv wit a nurse..
After much thinking, he finally writes a luv letter 2 her: "I LUV U SISTER"
===============================
MBBS Final Exam:-
Question: Fill in the blanks.
If a lady faints, we must 1st check her PU_S_
Only few intelligent students wrote PULSE
===============================
What is diffrence between problem & talent?
2 boys love 1 girl= problem!
1 boy love 2 girls= talent.
===============================
Girl : Mom, i m in love with a guy..
Mom shocked : How old is the boy & what is he doing Girl : 3 month & kicking happily in my stomach..
===============================
terrorists have kidnapped our lecturers... and demanded aransom of 500000 rs or else they will burn them with kerosene... plz donate. i have donated 15 litres.
===============================
can you lend me 2000 Rs? i need it. please help me out, i know you have it, i wil return it .a Banta asks to ATM machine???????
===============================
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding day?.?.?.?.... It is just a formality, like two boxers shaking hands b4 the fight begins !
===============================
One day Raja and rani decided to send messages to each other by using Pigeon instead of mobile. The very next day pigeon reached raja without any message.
He angried and called to rani.She told stupid "This was a missed call"
===============================
I send dis fish as a sign of friendship Plz take care of it & keep it in mobile & daily put ur mobile in water so tat fish wont DIE:-)
===============================
God made man and then rested. God made women and then no one rested
===============================
The rain makes all things beautiful. The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn�t it rain on you?
===============================
Could u fax me ur photo very very urgently ?
Mind u - it�s really very very urgent,
damn serious and very imp �
I�m playing cards and we�ve misplaced the JOKER.
===============================
oday, tomorrow and yesterday there will be �
one heart that would always beat for you �
You know Whose??? � your Own Stupid!!!
===============================
Life without u is impossible,
u r in my breath and blood.
i cant stay for a second without u,
if u r not there i am dead
oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN
===============================
have a confession to make
ever since i met u its been hard for me to 4get u
every night i see u in my dreams
and find myself shouting
GHOST GHOST
===============================
i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again
===============================
The animals of a jungle have decided to hold a meeting. The lion has come, the tiger has come, the elephant has come, the monkey has come.. But The meeting hasn�t started. Guess why ? Because the Donkey is busy reading this SMS!
===============================
The more I learn the more I get to know,
the more I know the more I forget,
the more I forget the less I know,
so why should I be learning??
===============================
Sweet candies are nice to eat �
Sweet words are easy to say �
but, sweet ppl are hard to find �
OH MY GOD! how did u find me?
===============================
Girl: when we get married, i want to share all your worries,
troubles and lighten your burden. boy: it's very kind of you,
darling, but i don't have any worries or troubles. girl: well that is because we aren't married yet
===============================
Newton's Law of Romance LOVE CAN NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE DESTROYED, IT CAN ONLY BE CHANGED FROM ONE GIRL FRIEND TO ANOTHER
===============================
Twinkle twinkle little star,
you should know what you are,
and once you know what you are,
Mental hospital is not so far.
===============================
Its INTERNATIONAL GOOD LOOKING DAY! send this to someone that you think is gorgeous, dont send it to me as I have had 100s already
Se
===============================
This message was sent exclusively for the handsome and the beautiful. We have obviously sent it to the wrong number. We are truly sorry for the inconvenience
===============================
Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
===============================
girl friends are like mobile phone, whenever you want happiness just check inbox, whenever u want to cry check out box, and whenever u want to enjoyment just plug in your charger and enjoy.
===============================
Husband asks, Do you know the meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information Fighting Everytime!
WIFE satys No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever.
source
[spoiler=open this] for :
http://www.smsdose.com/funny-texts.htm
</div>